Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Parental Favoritism
My recent thoughts have been turned to parental favoritism of their children. I know some friends have expressed to me that they feel their parents have a favorite(s) of their children and I agree that it does happen and feel the same way. So, as a parent of children now I want to try and avoid this so my children don't have the same feelings that I do, but I don't know how to go about it. So, please share your ideas, thoughts and words of wisdom with me. I want to start it at this early age and also make it a habit for myself. Thanks!
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That's something I've thought about recently, too, with my own kids. My husband greatly favors my daughter over my son(s). I tend to be more attentive to my baby, for obvious reasons. If you get any good ideas, let me know. :) For me, though, I've been trying to remember the bond I had with my older two when they were little and how special they were to me, well, and still are. They're so independent and that makes it hard to focus on them because they pretty much run by themselves.
ReplyDeleteYour post got me thinking, so I Googled your question and found some interesting articles with suggestions:
ReplyDeletethis one and this other one and this last one
I go in rounds on who I favor at the moment. Right now its my oldest (3), Its not intentional, but he is the easiest to deal with right now.
ReplyDeleteWe try to have something special with each one once a week.
For instance:
Thursdays is my husbands night to cook, so he rotates every week who gets to help him.
On those nights, who ever cooks with him also has to clean with him.
The other kids get to do something with me, like read a book or play dress up upstairs while that is happening.
On Wednesday nights we have mutual well I do, so I usually have a simple dinner, like a crock pot meal or something. I take one kid to help me pick it out and make it and the other one will help me pack my bag for mutual.
If I do those things separate but they both get a chance it spreads it out a lot more. We also take 1 kid with us if we have a quick errand and those who "get to stay at home" get to do something special with me, like sort clothes for the laundry or pick a special movie to watch with just me or my spouse.
Sounds lame, but it helps me appreciate each one and their level a lot more. Remember I had 3 in 2.5 years so I have to do little things now so I don't favor one over the other.
P.S. My dad admitted to me that my sister has always been his favorite...on my 20th birthday! Now that I am married with kids and have my own life and he can see all that I do like on my blog and junk like that...I think he is starting to come around, especially since he has come to grips that he was an unfair parent!
Hope that helps!
I was just going to tell you to talk to Valerie she is a pro at this stuff!
ReplyDeleteThanks Kate for doing some googling, I will definitely take a look at the articles.
ReplyDelete